You know, when somebody shows up on AIM, but they've walked away from the computer and don't respond to prompting, one must simply amuse oneself.

KimberlyNLTS: So ... once upon a time there was this woman named Kimberly, and she wrote all kinds of boring crap in an online journal ...
KimberlyNLTS: And for some reason, people came from miles around ... from all over the world ... to read her boring crap ...
KimberlyNLTS: And one of these people was named DarrenTorinWolfieboyWhatever, which was a long name and hard to say ten times fast, but he liked it anyway ...
KimberlyNLTS: And so he started reading Kimberly's boring crap, and they became friends, and soon Kimberly was bugging him on AIM with even *more* of her boring crap ...
KimberlyNLTS: And then he walked away from his computer and didn't turn his AIM off, and so Kimberly just rambled boring crap to herself.
KimberlyNLTS: The End.
KimberlyNLTS: Story #2 ...
KimberlyNLTS: Once upon a time, there was a woman who never slept at the "right" times ...
KimberlyNLTS: Nor did she wear the "right" clothes or weigh the "right" weight ...
KimberlyNLTS: And so her family looked at her and said, "Hmm. Something is not right here. This is just just just WRONG." And the woman (who was then only a girl) believed them and became very sad ...
KimberlyNLTS: She came to believe that even her right foot and right hand and right eye and right nostril and right earlobe were not "right" enough, and so she didn't like them ...
KimberlyNLTS: She thought to herself, "Well, if nothing about me is right, then perhaps I should be a leftist." ...
KimberlyNLTS: And so she started hanging around with people who had long hair and wore Birkenstocks and women who didn't wear make-up or shave their armpits ...
KimberlyNLTS: And the Birkenstock people looked at her and said, "You know? You're alright!" And the woman (who was by then a woman) believed them and became very happy.
KimberlyNLTS: The End