I know I'm probably fooling myself, but I keep hoping that the radiation and the chemo will "fix" him and he'll beat the odds.
At least I've gotten over my guilt about not going out there while he's doing chemo. I'm not sure what made the difference, but maybe it was just letting go of what I think everyone else wants me to do. That's hard for me -- very hard -- but in this case I seem to have managed it. We'll see if I'm able to hang on to that once he actually starts chemo.
