Kimberly (kimberly_a) wrote,

Robots vs. Loser Gamers

So for several weeks now, I've been playing Ticket To Ride online. It's a fairly straight-forward set collection game with a railroad theme. Lots of fun. You draw tickets, you use them to buy/place trains and claim routes, and you attempt to satisfy the specific goals that you have drawn from the stack of goals ("tickets").

Anyway, so this game really doesn't require any social interaction. And I do mean ANY. There is never any actual in-game need to communicate with other players. While you're playing, however, there is a small chat window in the lower left of the screen. This can sometimes be useful to remind people when it is their turn, to help new people figure out how to play the game, etc.

But I've mostly stopped playing against other players now. I only play the 'bots -- computerized players -- in a type of solitaire. Why, you may ask? Because I've had too many "conversations" in the chat window while trying to play the game. Conversations like this:
Annoying Player: are you girl or boy?
Kimberly: why?
Annoying Player: i want to talk to nice girl
Kimberly: then perhaps you should go to the "nice girl" chat room
Annoying Player: are you boy or girl?
Kimberly: I can't imagine how that possibly impacts the game we're playing
Annoying Player: you don't want to talk?
Kimberly: I'm here to play a game. It's your turn.
Annoying Player: are you boy or girl?
Kimberly: My husband can verify that I am all woman.
Annoying Player: how old are you?
Kimberly: 93
Annoying Player: [random stuff]
Annoying Player: [more random stuff]
Annoying Player: [more random stuff]
Kimberly: [continues silently playing cards and trains]
Annoying Player: you really don't want to talk
Kimberly: I mostly don't look at the chat window while I'm playing. It's your turn.
I tried to explain to one of these people that I come to the Ticket To Ride game site in order to play Ticket To Ride, not to chat. If I wanted to chat, I'd go to a chat room. Or go outside. Or phone a friend.

But I guess some (pathetic) people consider everything on the Internet to be a chat opportunity. Give me some nice anti-social gamers any day. Just play the game and quit asking me how old I am or where I live or what color underwear I'm wearing.

But then -- in addition to the Chatty Cathies out there who just want to make "friends" -- there are the people who get all pissed off at me when I play cards in a perfectly legitimate way that unfortunately messes up their plans. They particularly don't like it when I purposely block something they're trying to do. "Unfair!" some cry. Others exclaim, "Bad behavior!" Yet another wailed, "That was rude!"

And then there are the people who are almost the opposite: the people who, while I'm taking my last turn, start typing things like, "oooooooo i win. u suck!" Actually, those are probably the same people who cry "bad behavior!" ... they just gloat when they win and pout when they don't.

In short, people suck. Every time I sit down to play Ticket To Ride lately, I consider playing against other people ... and then I realize that I just don't want to deal with their obnoxious cluelessness (and clumsy pick-up lines).

I'm not interested in being scammed on by boys/men from foreign countries. Come to think of it, I'm not interested in being scammed on by girls/women from foreign countries, either. And if they aren't from foreign countries, well, then they interest me even LESS.

I'm not interested in playing against babies who think I should be helping them win instead of trying to win against them. I'm not interested in playing against babies who feel the need to prove their manliness by loudly beating their hairless chests when they win a game.

In short, I like robots. That pretty much sums it up.

Maybe I can get some of the people I know in real life (Shannon, Michael, Chris, etc.) to play once in a while. For now, the robot is my friend.
Tags: games

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