December 10th, 2013

me blue hair

Mostly Medication and Music

A librarian at the Berkeley Public Library (South Branch) told me today that there are apps available that would allow me to use my iPod Touch as a phone (for free) via wifi. Wow. So I looked it all up tonight & now I have a free fake cell phone whenever I can connect to wifi. Neato keen.

Anxiety bad again today. Fled CWC after only 2 hours (support group and lunch). Very sleepy all day. Fell asleep in the waiting room at my therapist's office (I was an hour early, since I fled CWC earlier than planned) & was apparently sleeping so soundly that I was snoring & she had to shake me to wake me. I barely remember the session, because I was so tired. We mostly talked about the joys of medication side effects & their myriad interactions.

I think Latuda may be having three unpleasant effects on me:
1. insomnia
2. increased anxiety
3. mild, random, all-over-body itching
I'll see how tonight and tomorrow go, but I predict that I will soon stop taking Latuda and will be switching to experimenting with some other mood stabilizer, such as Depakote or Trileptal. And then we start the side effect gamble all over again.

My new musical obsession is Regina Spektor. My favorite lyrics of hers are from "On the Radio":

This is how it works
You're young until you're not
You love until you don't
You try until you can't
You laugh until you cry
You cry until you laugh
And everyone must breathe
Until their dying breath

No, this is how it works
You peer inside yourself
You take the things you like
And try to love the things you took
And then you take that love you made
And stick it into some-
Someone else's heart
Pumping someone else's blood
And walking arm in arm
You hope it don't get harmed
But even if it does
You'll just do it all again

But i've still been humming "Tom's Diner" pretty frequently. I also love the song "Walking the Dog" by fun. Katherine: You're the one who put this fun. song on one of your mixes for me ... are there any other similarly upbeat fun. songs that I should investigate? Or similar types of songs by other artists? You always find the best music.