Kimberly (kimberly_a) wrote,

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Headachey but hopeful

Ack. Bad headache. But I wore my slouchy beret-type beanie much of the day with no apparent ill effects. I stopped wearing it hours ago (just to make sure I didn't tempt Headache Fate), and only now, much later, has my headache become bad. In fact, I went most of today (and, in fact, most of time in the past few days) with no headache at all. Most of the time I was wearing the hat today, I wasn't aware of it at all—it didn't feel remotely binding—whereas it felt like a vice & hurt a lot a few weeks ago. So that seems to have improved.

I saw my surgeon today for my second post-op appointment for Surgery #2, and she looked at both my eyes & declared them lovely and perfect. They are apparently healing very well, though I have woken once or twice to find myself instinctively rubbing my eyes roughly enough to make me panic for a brief moment, then lower my hands and frantically look all around, afraid that I might have knocked one of my new lenses out of place or something. The lenses and their placement in my eyes seem pretty hardy, though, and have suffered no apparent damage. And now I get to sleep any old way I want to! Right side, left side, which side shall I pick? It's Friday, Friday ...

I noticed today that my distance vision in my right eye is no longer very good. It was great right after the surgery, but now there's a very significant, noticeable difference between the left eye and the right. It makes sense, given that my near vision in my right eye has become tremendously better, that my distance vision in that eye has gotten worse. The clear area of vision in that eye has simply moved closer to my face.

Immediately after my second surgery, 8 days ago, my vision in both eyes was 20/25. When the doc tested me today, I was 20/20 in my left eye and 20/50 in my right eye. That makes it sound like I have bad vision in my right eye, but that isn't the case at all ... I just have different vision in that eye. Saying that my vision in my left eye is 20/20 makes it sound like it's perfect, but it's impossible to read anything within 2 feet of my face with that eye. It's all more complicated than numbers make it sound.

Anyway, regardless of numbers, and regardless of how the eyes have grown more and more different in their areas of clarity, I am very happy with how well I can see in the distance, how well I can see close up, and how well the two eyes are working together.

Today's Tylenol+Codeine Usage
3 tablets total, though the headaches are now less frequent and less severe. I take 1/2 tablet when my head is hurting, and I take 1/2 tablet more if the pain doesn't go away. That doesn't change the fact that most of the day my head feels fine. It just goes through periods here and there when it doesn't, and often in the evening it really doesn't, and so I usually end up taking 2 tablets between dinner and bedtime, which are sometimes the only pills I take all day, and are pretty much always the majority of the pills I take. My head used to hurt all the time ... now it just hurts mostly in the evenings.

Now that I think about it, my head used to hurt mostly only in the evenings, and then it got worse and worse until it was hurting all day long ... so maybe the process is now reversing itself.

I don't expect the headaches to vanish instantaneously, since my vision is still changing (and is expected to continue to do so for the next 3 weeks or so) and my inexperienced use of reading glasses is sporadic and often pain-inducing. Even if the pinched nerve was not a factor (and I'm assuming it still is), I would expect the eyes alone to still be causing me some headache problems.

And then there's the fact that my body is accustomed to a certain amount of daily codeine. But I'm not going to worry about that right now. I'm not going to worry about that. I'm not going to worry about that. I'm not going to ...

Tonight was the swanky fundraiser for Bonita House, so it is possible (probable?) that some of my art has now been purchased by complete strangers. I think I may learn the results on Monday, but I can't be sure. There may be bureaucracy involved before that info makes its way to the artists involved. I must admit I'm hoping that my elephants (the collage titled "Protection," seen below) will fetch a respectable sum. I think it's really rather interesting—a rather unique technique and vision—and I hope that other people may feel the same way.
Protection (elephant) photo
(The photo is a bit dark, but it's a much better pic than any of the others I tried to post here previously.) If nothing else, I'm flattered that my works were even chosen for the auction, when so much other wonderful artwork by more experienced artists was passed over. It appears that some people (people like the Bonita House auction woman, the 10x10 people who gave me the award for my cherry blossom collage, my art teacher who was clearly shocked that none of my pieces were chosen for the Civic Center exhibition, the guy who begged to buy the elephants "Protection" collage a few months ago, and my admittedly rather biased but extremely supportive husband) really respect my art. It helps me move more in that direction, myself, and not just think of it as "arts-and-crafts," like something you'd do in the mental hospital to keep you quiet or between swim lessons at summer camp.
Tags: art, being a professional artist, bonita house, cataracts, central nervous system, clc, collage, crafts, cwc, doctors, eyes, hats, headaches, meds-codeine, meds-tylenol, pain, reading glasses, self-esteem, self-image, selling, sleep, surgery, vision

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