Kimberly (kimberly_a) wrote,

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Bad Cobweb Dream

Terrible terrible dream, and so now I'm out of bed at 5 a.m., not afraid to go back to sleep, as is sometimes the case when I have scary nightmares and don't want them to start up again where they left off (or repeat, as they sometimes do) ... it's more like I'm just traumatized enough that sleep feels impossible for the moment.

In my dream, Cobweb was very sick, as she is in real life, and we were concerned about her, and she was outside in our backyard, just chillin' and checking out squirrels and stuff, sitting on top of a post. I was inside, watching this through a window (actually a door with a big window in the top half, much like the real-life door to our real-life backyard), and Shannon was in the backyard interacting with her.

We were both kinda trying to get her attention, and she unexpectedly got intently fascinated by something Shannon had done, and I could see her coiling to leap ... but the leap in front of her (from the backyard post to a corner of the house/roof) was like 15 feet. And, dude, she's 16 years old and sickly! I was horrified at what I could see coming, but there was nothing I could do. And then she jumped, and missed her landing (of course), and sorta slammed to the ground, through some bushes, so that I couldn't see her anymore.

I'm not sure what Shannon was doing at this point on the dream, but I was frantically trying to open the back door so that I could run to my cat and see if she was okay, but apparently you needed a key to unlock the door to get outside, and I was so panicked that I couldn't figure out how my keys worked. It was like the entire concept of keys had just fled my brain, and I ended up just frantically slapping my hands against the door and scratching at the door's surface in desperation.

Eventually, I found my way outside and ran to find Cobweb, and she was lying limp on the ground, but she was breathing funny, and some other animal (a small dog, I think?) was keeping her company, just sitting by her side and talking with her or communing with her or something. And I somehow knew that meant she was dying.

It's weird, because I thought I'd pretty much accepted in real life that Cobweb will die relatively soon, but when I actually saw her struggling with her last breaths in the dream, it was horrible. Maybe because it was unexpected and sudden? Maybe because I'm not so accepting as I thought?

I woke up around then, and now I'm keeping busy, looking out at the pitch dark world. I plan to try to go back to sleep in a bit.
Tags: cats, cobweb, dreams, sleep

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